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Sunday, 13 March 2011
People are always wondering why i take your crap or why i am the way i am or why i still care about you? there are so many answers i could tell these people but even then i don't think they would get it. To answer the first question why i take hes crap or anyone else for that matter well ill tell ya..When i care about someone i don't just want to give up on them cuz of a stupid fight or cuz they have lied to me..i always try to see the good in everyone even though yes i know i shouldn't cuz normally i end up getting hurt but i don't care. I like being there for people when i know they need me to be. i care about people more then i should and i know that but i just cant give up on people that's just the way i am. I didn't give up on my friend for 11 years even though we stopped talking for awhile cuz i knew that we would fix things one day and that's what happened. just like with the guy i care about him and I'll always be there for him no matter what our past was like cuz i love him and that's that. to answer the second question why i am the way i am well that's easy. I was born this way, i was always so scared to do anything always so worried what people thought about me. I always thought i was too ugly or too fat to dress the way i wanted to or be the way i wanted too until i met the people i have in my life now. My besties Megz and Rina and SH changed my life forever. Rina was the first person to accept me when i moved here, Megz befriended me when i had no one else in my life and SH tough me to love myself no matter what people say or think. Thanks to all these people I finally stick up for myself and dyed my hair red with black in it, got a tattoo and stretched out my ears and become a bit punky lol. its always how i wanted to be so I'm doing it on my own terms. I found people who have accept me for me and in turn i have accepted them for how they are as people. Now for the last question why i still care about you well here goes nothing lol. I still care about him cuz being around him is like a breath of fresh air. When I'm around him its so easy like I've known him forever like we are old friends. Hes just so easy to be around its crazy..Hes the first guy I've ever been able to open up to and be my self with. I can get mad at him and call him names but he'd still be there for me, i mean what kind of guy would put up with all your bullshit and still stick around you? He know why i don't trust guy and why i am the way i am he knows everything there is to know about me and he accepts it and its wonderful. I love being able to just be me with him. Hes my best guy friend who I've fallen in love with. Even if I'm not the one he wants then so be it, ill deal with it cuz i rather have him in my life as a friend then not have him in my life at all so ya..i think I've answered all the question to the best of my knowledge if i think about more ill write more to this but this is all i can think of at the moment....